Letter to you

Dear You..

Someone who makes me smile,
Someone that can makes my heart beat fast in one time,
Someone who gave a shine on, when my head full of dark clouds.

Someone who can let my dreams always on.
Dreaming all about my life could be together with you.

But sometimes, can be my mood makers too.
Cheer me up and get me down.

Your smile,
Were rarely seen. Yeah rarely.
Your eye gaze,
I felt something in there, something that I can't explain what is it.
your serious face,
That makes me fascinated.
Your flat face,
That makes me keep my mouth shut.
And...
Your back side..

And there is often that I saw on you.
When so lucky I am can seeing you at that moment, even just for a moment.
It felt good enough to me.
Although the deepest in my heart said otherwise after i got that feeling.

Sometimes,
the feeling is so strong,
So optimistic,
That I can be with you..

But sometimes,
I feels, the feeling is so wrong. How stupid I am.
And suddenly, my logic take over my thought.

Someday, I ever try to ignore the feeling.
I talked to myself,  a lot.
I had to stopped it.
Stop to dreaming of you to be mine, stop to over thinking about you.
It's never gonna happen, me and you. 

But in the other side,
I'm really, really wants to be with you. So much, much, much more.

*what kind of thought ? *plak*.

*awry* .
Pathetic.

And now,
I can't do both of,

Waiting..
It means I just sitting down and see, what is going to be.
*(I mean really ? Just waiting ?)*
*are you have a mind ?*

sorry, that was my evil side who said so.
next,

or,

Take a movement,
That it means, go, talk to you.

(* for number two, I bet that would never never, and ever, gonna happen. *)

And, finally.. Like I said, I can't and I won't, do the both of them.

I Just can, let it be. And think clearly.

Don't think too much, because it can be so painful if it's not to be as what as you wants to be, isn't it ?
And, don't think too less, because..
Nothing is impossible. Everything can be out of your mind. Can be worst,  and can be good, right ?

It's all depends on God, and absolutely ourself too.
I believe there is connected. .

So.....
Dear you,
Hai.